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Exhausted

Yesterday morning, Friday, I woke up totally exhausted.  No idea why, but I could have spent another hour or two in bed.  I thought a little bit about this and why it might be. There are a couple of reason’s that I came up with.  But first let me explain why I was thinking about it.  Whenever I start to exercise, strive for better health, I reach this point, usually a little after the two week mark, where my body is just tired and I have no desire to go exercise (usually early morning runs) or to eat healthy.  It’s almost like clockwork and I’d like to get over this.

So for what I think might have happened.

  • Stressful situation right before I left work the previous night (Thursday night)
  • Fasted on Tuesday until lunch time – Don’t think this was the case, but it’s something I’m looking out for.
  • Ate like crap on Thursday – I’m a stress eater and due to situation number 1 above, I didn’t have exactly the best diet that night.  M&M’s and an ice cream sandwich!
  • Slept worse than I thought I did

I’m not sure which one of the above things it was, or a combination of all of them, but in an attempt to find my best health I’m going to be putting these down when I notice them.  It might just be a mental block, but it’s something that I need to figure out.

How it all began

I think I was probably 34 or 35 when I had my first physical in awhile and the doctor told me my blood pressure was to high. As with most doctors he told me I needed to get 30 minutes of aerobic activity 5 days a week. So I set about doing that.  What I found out was that I have white coat syndrome, for whatever reason, and my blood pressure spikes. So I started tracking it at home. It was better there. I did however try to get in the prescribed aerobic activity. This might have brought my blood pressure down a little bit but I know it did not help me lose weight which is what I had really started chasing after.

I’ve learned a lot along the way, but as I mentioned in the previous post, I feel like I’m spinning in circles with all the information out there. Here is my current mode of thinking about this.

  • What and how we eat is most important for blood pressure and weight control.
  • I enjoy running and will continue to do it but it is probably more important to get some sort of weight training and HIIT in. I will begin to work that in after my upcoming trail race.
  • There is a mental aspect to this that I believe I’m pretty weak on and I want to put some focus on this to try and bring some balance to the three aspects of health.

It’s not always easy to do all of this stuff with a family. Especially the eating part but I’m trying my hardest to figure it out.

I’m trying to keep it simple otherwise I find myself getting bogged down in the details.

Health after 40

I believe when everyone thinks of health they think of ripped bodies that are able to run for miles or can lift a ton of weights. And part of my view of health is like that but as I’ve struggled to get healthier, in my opinion, I realize it’s a lot more. Not only do I think there’s a physical aspect to it but there’s a mental aspect to it and there’s a nutrition aspect to it. I believe that those three things need to work together to achieve health.

Back in the day I had a blog tracking my weight lifting progress and other things. A journal. My hope is that despite all that is going on I’ll be able to put down notes here on my journey and hopefully get feedback in due time. Right now I have little accountability and I’m hoping that by ‘reporting’ here I will gain some accountability. Additionally I hope that I will be able to pick up some patterns to help things go smoother. I feel as if I’ve been drowning in all this health information and I just keep spinning in circles going nowhere. I’m ready to go somewhere.

So what will I define as health or moving the bar in the right direction? Losing weight is the easy one to pick and I hope that will drop but I have something else I want to try and track. That is the waist to height ratio. Basically lose inches around the waist until we are at half of our height. I believe that right now I’m near a 40″ waist vs my height of 71″. That works out to: .56 (I will get more specific later this week). So I have a ways to go. From what I’ve read this ratio is a good indicator of health and your risk. Along the way I suspect I will come up with other goals to add to the list. Hopefully not getting to many of them!

So here we go!

Facebook is stalking me!

Around the first of the year I decided that I wasn’t going to spend as much time on Facebook.  I just wasn’t finding any value in it.  I didn’t kill my account but I told myself I was only going to check in once a week.  And to date that has been the case.  Once a week for maybe 15 minutes and then I’d sign out of my account again.

Somewhere along the line I gave Facebook my phone number.  I don’t remember if this was on purpose of if it was voluntary.  I suspect I had to for something. But this has turned into something bad.  About once a day now, for some reason, Facebook sends me a text that reminds me of something someone has posted on Facebook.  It’s as if I’ve reached some point where I don’t visit Facebook enough so they are trying to entice me with text messages.  So far I haven’t given in to these messages.  But what it will do is make me kill my account.

Just something to note.  While I don’t find much use with Facebook I do find other uses for social media.  Specifically with Twitter I find much more value out of it.  Weird since the people I follow on Twitter are not people I know.  More than anything I’m following “experts” in the fields that I enjoy following! Just an interesting observation.

Work

While I consider myself a good worker, I struggle with work.  Odd you may think, but let me explain.

It was about 2000 when I first remember the drive to create something great on the internet.  I don’t know if, at that time, it was so that I could try and be a bazillionaire or what (for what it’s worth I wanted to create a high school sports site).  From there I think it just kept growing here and there.

Somewhere along the line I came to think that well since mom and dad were self employed maybe  I should be as well and I’d be much happier if I was self employed.  But wait…mom and dad didn’t have health insurance or retirement.  They had to work thru those sick days and it was a struggle at times.  Maybe that wasn’t such a good idea, but that being self employed still sticks in the back of my mind.

In addition to wanting to make boat loads of money and be self employed I think, for my generation, or perhaps just in the field I’ve worked in, I feel like if you don’t have some sort of side gig making you some extra money your doing it wrong.  Or if you’re not hopping from exotic location to exotic location working for 2 minutes a day your doing it wrong.

Lastly working in the newspaper business for a fair amount of my career so far probably has not been the best.  I never chose to work in that industry because it was my calling and I wanted to hold the government accountable (funny that I now work for the government).  I chose it because it paid the bills and at the start it was a good wage.  But over time that pay degraded, or my thoughts of what was good pay was upped, and I felt like I was under appreciated.

Bosses also didn’t help.  I don’t think, until now, I’ve ever had a boss that has been for the employees.  It’s always been about the bottom line.  My current boss, for all of her faults, is for the employees as much as she can be. She understands, I feel.

I’m coming to grips with all of these thoughts that have been haunting me the past 20 years.  They still poke their nasty heads out, but I’m feeling like I have better control over them.  I think a big part of it has to do with being grateful for what I do have.  Yeah I haven’t had a pay raise in years and even took a pay cut.  However I do have a job with pretty good benefits.  When I stop and really start to focus on what I don’t have, that is when I get down and get pissed at work and wonder if I could do it better on my own.  I’m not saying that maybe I won’t have a side gig that makes a bit of money, but I’m also happy not having it and thinking about it all the time.

I don’t know if these feelings are a generational thing, but I kind of think it might be.  I look at some people I know who are a big older and they, to my knowledge, are not trying to create a side gig or hustle.  They are just enjoying the time with their family.

Lastly this leaves us with the current work situation. As I’ve mentioned with many members of the family I feel as I’ve I’ve gone from one side of the pendulum where it was crisis all the time (newspaper; perhaps also my view point) to the other side where at times I have very little to do and it borders on boredom. My feelers will be out there this year looking at other opportunities and maybe something will come from it. Perhaps this is where God has me and where I will be until he says differently. I don’t know. I do know that staying here at the state for the long term is probably not doable (perhaps in another position it might be).

I’m curious to hear other thoughts on work and I suspect as this year goes by I will revisit this issue.

Writing 2018

I’d like to think that in 2017 I’ve done a fair amount of writing. Most of it’s just journalling, but it’s writing none the less. As we head into 2018 I want to write even more!

So I hope as we head into this new year that I’ll be writing more here. I’m not really sure what I’ll be writing about, it might be journalling or it might be fiction or it might be random other stuff that happens to tickle my fancy at that time.

I’m putting this up to hold myself accountable and to hopefully have you hold me accountable as well (if anyone is still visiting this site!) My goal is simply to have one post a week for a total of 52 posts. On the flip side of wanting to be an author of some sort I’m the absolute worst at keeping anything going long term. Great starter of things but horrible at finishing stuff. My ultimate goal would be that this becomes a habit and something I don’t have think about. It becomes natural.

Hopefully some of what I’ve written about you will find interesting. Perhaps not!

Lastly everyone that currently has an account on the site has been set to an author account. So if by some chance you feel the need to write feel free to do so! (I can help you get started in this interface I you need help)

Happy 2018!

Trail running – July 2017

Two days later I’m still sore from a almost 7 mile trail run at Curt Gowdy. My feet hurt. My lower legs hurt when I go down the stairs but not going up! It was not my intent to do 7 miles but my communication with the guy I was running with was apparently not on point and I wasn’t going to argue. We were just on a run in the woods. And I forgot my water and it was hot.
The route we ended up running was a lot of the 8 mile race course that I ran last year. Its down hill for a bit, but then it starts climbing from there where it reaches the peak of that area. To give you an idea of what it’s like, it is like the Turtle Rock trail but with more climbing on it (maybe not as high bit I’m not sure). After climbing we then ‘bored’ our way back down to Crow Creek and across it for another climb, but this one a lot more gradual. 

Besides forgetting my water bottle, which won’t happen again, it was a pretty uneventful run. I do not remember being this sore after my 8 mile race last year but I was also running a lot more miles (not that many). I’ve signed up for the four mile race this year but I am contemplating changing to the 8 for more of a challenge! Despite the soreness I wish that I could get out onto the trails a bit more. Despite the heavy breathing and the pain, at times, it’s great to be out in nature.